My Refuge

Novembe 1, 2013

Eleven months into the year. Eleven months into a physical trial that started Jan. 7th of this year. I would like to report that I am doing much better, however I do still have soreness and times I need not speak to much!

I will also say at times lately I tend to get very frustrated. There are times I just would like to feel normal again, full of energy and able to focus better. All the soreness and draining days can bring on times that I can easily lose focus on the feet I desire to follow.

I remember in these, moments of self pity, of all His servants I have read about in His word. Many of different pains and troubles. They faced some for short times and others continually. I often think of Paul so very much of the time. Not just about all he endured but the words he wrote in Philippians.

                 "To be content"

In these moments I also reflect not only of those of the past but for so many today that are seeking my fathers will and are beig prosecuted for it. For all those that are serving and loving others in Christ Jesus' name continually, yet doing without. Without daily furnishings we take for granit, without food, without safety of themselves or their families. Those who suffer pain but yet continue....

                    "To be content"

There have been times thru this year I have felt stronger in my faith than lately, honestly I have been fighting against those powers and principalities wanting to stop reading, stop listening, stop pursuing after my Lord. 

I know however who I belong to and who it is seeking to get between me and my father. Is it hard to keep going at times? Yes but I must push on!

It is not about  me or what I may face here, but where I will spend eternity.

I can look back at this year that has flown bye and can feel sadness of things I have missed. But I instantly remember all that has come out thru all this. I can look and see where there were times of doubt but I can also look back and see Him in so much!

I seen Him in the tears of my close friend as she gave her life over to Christ.

I seen Him in the big smile of my daughters best friend as she too gave her life over to Christ.

I have seen Him in my family and the many blessings.

I have seen Him in prayers answered.

I have felt Him in the all the love and prayers from others.

I have felt in comfort I felt in unsure moments.

I have heard Him in the words He wrote that I have had lots of time to study this year.

I have heard Him in words from others as they have comforted and encouraged me thru this year.

I have learned this year....

I want Him to be my strength when I  am weak. To give me courage when I fear.

For He is my refuge!